The Fool Wiki

Hannah Montana: Wikis


Note: Many of our articles have direct quotes from sources you can cite, within the Wikipedia article! This article doesn't yet, but we're working on it! See more info or our list of citable articles.

Uncyclopedia

Up to date as of February 05, 2010

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.

Satan Loves This Article

The Prince of Darkness — the ultimate purveyor of all things wicked, vile, and malevolent — has personally reviewed this article. The submitter and all subsequent editors are damned to eternal torment in hellfire
Considering selling your soul? For great rates call 1-800-666-EVIL.

      Whoops! Maybe you were looking for Barbie?
Blond, blue-eyed mid-western American sings music of the fatherland. Who wouldn't love that?
“Everyone's favorite Fraulein.”
~ Noel Coward on Hannah Montana
“I get thawed out and find out that my company has turned into this!”
~ Walt Disney on Hannah Montana
“I predict Miley Cyrus will be depleted by as early as 2013!”
~ Marion King Hubert on Hannah Montana

Hannah Montana refers to an individual, and the self-autobiographical American children's porno television series which shows on the Disney Channel. The series focuses on Miley Stuart Donaldson, who lives a double life as an average teenage girl at school during the day, and a famous neo-Nazi folk singer at night, called Hannah Montana - concealing her real identity from the public other than her close friends and family. Even though she looks AND sounds the same as Hannah Montana nobody knows who she is.

She was previously called "Hannah California", but this was changed by her father because California "wasn't white enough".

She is also closely related to the late fellow Neo-Nazi Ian Stuart Donaldson.

Her new album, Breakout!

Contents

TV Show

Hannah Montana's Best Of Both Worlds concert, in honor of that one Star Trek episode.
Hannah Montana has influenced many teenage girls to become racist, anti-Semetic and KKK members.
For those without comedic tastes, the self-proclaimed experts at Wikipedia have an article about Hannah Montana.

With a number of recurring characters including her redneck father (Played by her real life father and brother, Billy-Ray Stuart Donaldson) Lola Luftwaffe (Hannah's best friend and confidante) and Jackson Stuart Donaldson (Miley's skinheaded hot, tattooed brother) Other characters include Thor (A rather angry major German god with a liking for lightning) and Doktor Josef (A mid-eastern American doctor with an unusual accent and an interest in disabled children *COUGH* euthanasia!)

The show is now entering its third season, and is one of the most successful series aimed at the white, Anglo-Saxon demographic, following on from Buffy the Negroslayer and Sabrina the Teenage Ordnungspolizei.

Ideology

Hannah and her family have strong ties to the White Nationalist Wiki organization, an infamous white nationalist group with no sense of humour. Their ideas and theories have been described as racist and white supremacist in nature by many organizations. The Daily Telegraph reports that on stage, Hannah Montana execute a Nazi salute, as well as some leading members of the local Jewish population joining in. Also, Hannah belongs to the Turban Society of America.

However, Miley claims not to be a supremacist, but separatist, saying she wants a homeland for white people and that being supremacist contradicts the ideology of separatism. This state should include much of the Western world, specifically the places that have the most money, and look the most nice.

During a recent interview, she said that she believes Adolf Hitler was a great man with good ideas, such as eugenic standards and incentives to improve the genetic quality of the German people, and marriage loans to help qualified German families to have a firm financial basis. Also, she added that he loved his dog, Blarg. In the interview, Hannah described the Holocaust as being "exaggerated" and "blown out of all proportion" - when you come to think of it, just like Oklahoma. Other than this, she claims that the Holocaust is a lie and was just simply a very long and boring movie that brainwashed everybody in that period.

She believes that Great Adolf (As she likes to call him) will one day rise from the dead and make her his Queen Nazi. Obviously, Adolf and she have many romantic bones in their bodies.

Future and death

Montana's statements regarding the future direction of her career have been decidedly vague. On more than one occassion, she has referenced a 'Grand Rebirth' and 'The Rise of A Fourth Reich'. E-Mail records indicate that she has been sending messages to her family and friends, stating that they should "Stay in their homes for awhile, and perhaps stock up on essential supplies like shotguns and crowbars". She has been spotted at various Disney celebrity hotspots, bidding tearful farewell to all the 'Dark people', who, sadly, "won't be able to hide in my invulnerable atomic bunker when the glorious radioactive thunderbolts of Fryeyr fall like gentle summer rain along your filthy dark-skinned cities, as the earth runs black with the teeming masses of my undead countrymen."

Her spokesperson has vehemently denied these claims, for pataphysical reasons.

A few months ago she was beaten up in a subway by the members of Radiohead.

Hospital Treatment

On 10/10/10 Miley/Hannah was sent to the oregon state hospitaly in McMurpheys ward because of her un-treated multiple personality disorder. On her first week, she killed a nurse named Ms. Ratchet. Miley was named a hero among the other inmates (And a few doctors and nurses kicked ratchets lifeless body) Good for her.

Discography

Thousands of screaming fans, clad in traditional white outfits, arrive to see Hannah Montana perform at the 2006 Lollapalooza Festival. Many of them bring their own candles for the poignant encore.
  • Father of Mein: A collection of classic tunes including "Run, Nigger, Run" (The official song of the 1936 Olympic Games) and "Fight for your Reich (to Party)". The title track refers to Hannah's love for her father, following the custody battle involving her mother.
  • The Path I Choose: The first album from Hannah Montana featuring newly-recorded songs, including the 2005 hits "Panzr Boi", and "Start The Holocaust All Over", which were written for Hannah by a group of fat people who write cookie-cutter pop songs for popstars. "Worst Of All Jews" made it into the Top 100 countdown, staying at number one for several weeks. "Achy Breaky Heartlands" was written by her father, and contains many guitar riffs from Slipknot. The song "7 Things I Hate About Jews" is considered a timeless classic and hit the top 10 charts in Aryania. It has also received a lot of airplay, triggering many chaotic events, sending the natural world into a state of disarray., and attracting evil spirits of deceased Nazis back to Earth to reclaim what was once....umm...."theirs". SeeWar of the Worlds.
  • Heimatland: A poignant collection of traditional song covers that originate from the fatherland. It includes "Workin' für den Führer" and "Eier und Schinken macht die Deutschen allmächtig", both sung as a revival of traditional values by Hannah Montana, to show her commitment to her land and heritage. The limited edition of the album, released only in Germany, also contains a moving cover of "Sex auf dem Bauernhof.

See Also

This article was featured on 16 October 2007. Click here to see the featured version.

190px-Featured.png

Featured Article Featured version: 16 October 2007
This article has been featured on the front page. — You can vote for or nominate your favourite articles at Uncyclopedia:VFH.
Template:FA/16 October 2007Template:FA/2007

This article uses material from the "Hannah Montana" article on the Uncyclopedia wiki at Wikia and is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike License.







Got something to say? Make a comment.
Your name
Your email address
Message