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Jennifer Aniston: Wikis


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Uncyclopedia

Up to date as of February 05, 2010

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.

Jennifer Aniston

Date of birth: February 11, 1969
Birth location: Sherman Oaks, California, United States
Implants: Are you kidding me?
Spouse: Brad Pitt (2000-2005)
“I'd love to see her as a dominatrix! With ME!”
~ random masochistic coffee addict
“I think I STILL prefer Brad Pitt. Sorry.”
~ Vince Vaughn on what Jennifer prefers
“More knuckle sandwiches coming up”
~ Angelina Jolie on Jennifer Aniston
“She's TOTALLY HOT.”
~ That horny dude from... that thing. on Jennifer Aniston
“She has really, really sexy feet.”
~ ZxTWO on Jennifer Aniston
“She'll never find another Brad!”
~ Tabloids on how Brad Pitt cheated on his wife with Jon Voight's daughter (Seriously!)
For the religious among us who choose to believe lies, the so-called experts at Wikipedia have an article about Jennifer Aniston.


Mostly known for the acting in the 102nd BEST TV show ever, Friends.

When People Still Cared

People used to care about Jen, when she was on Friends, a shitty TV show, and dated Brad Pitt. She still lives in that world, also known as the 6th Dimension. All the damn coverage about her divorce is overexposed. We know the big lipped beauty took Brad, we know it's over, just shut up about Jennifer already. No one gives a rat's ass about her.

Nowadays, the only time people think of her, is when someone brings up the subject again (which they shouldn't, because Jennifer is worthless).

Cover yourself up, Grandma!

Jolie vs. Aniston

Jennifer Aniston
Age Who cares? She dates older guys anyway 40
Height Tall 5'4
Weight Depends on her mood 6 lbs
Born June 4, 1975 Feb 11
Ex Jonny Lee Miller, Billy Bob Thornton Brad Pitt, John Mayer, Vince Vaughn
Weak Points Her beauty All of her is weak
Sexuality Bisexual Beastiality
What would happen if these 2 have a catfight Would murder the plain, boring blonde bitch She'd die
Best Friends Brad Pitt No one actually likes her
Enemies Jennifer Aniston Angelina Jolie
Why we like her Her good heart, her beauty So fit you could ride her like a blackpool donkey
Most famous for Portraying Gia Someone ugly and spoiled on a horrid TV show
Now dating Brad Pitt No one for long!
Children Six None yet!

This article uses material from the "Jennifer Aniston" article on the Uncyclopedia wiki at Wikia and is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike License.







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