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“The perfect family vacation spot!”
While the current name of the island is "Orgasm Island", the natives had a different name for it. In the native Orgasmian language, the island is called Ke-Chu Tiki gak Quir, which literally means "Orgasm Island." The current name comes from Sir Benjamin Cummington, the British explorer who discovered the island, who was quoted as saying:
|Holy shi...ah, oh my lord...what a-ooh!...sensation...!|
By all accounts, he and the rest of his crew had an orgasm upon setting foot on the island, hence them naming it "Orgasm Island."
Not much is known about pre-British Orgasm Island, but it is generally agreed upon that the natives migrated from nearby Pen Island. Early accounts by the Chinese stated that the native Orgasmians were "always eerily happy" and "had their faces contorted in the strangest of ways at all times." Other sources come from various people such as native Filipinos and Japanese. These have yet to be discovered, though.
Orgasm Island was discovered in 1732 by the Spanish, who were too busy colonizing the Philippines to do anything but give the island a name: La Colonia Real del Magnífico Imperio de España: Santiago de las Filipinas cerca de Isla de Pluma y la Isla de Orgasmo. Which, according to my Spanish-English dictionary, means "suck mah dick hel yah." Huh. Those frisky Spaniards...
The first European to set foot on the island was Sir Benjamin Cummington, a British explorer who claimed the island for Britain in 1762. He successfully subdued the natives and formed the city of Cummington; named after himself. Occasionally, there were a few revolts against British colonization, but they usually subsided when they forgot what they were revolting against.
Nude beaches aren't the only aspect of Orgasmian culture, though. Another quirky fact about them is that they never wear any clothes, ever. This is because they found out very long ago that if they wear clothes, they will only get wet. The native tribes have never been at war with each other, either. The most widely accepted theory as to why this is is that they are too busy having frequent orgasms to care about who controls what.
Orgasm Island is a famous tourist spot in the Pacific Ocean. It's main attractions are the Cummington, the capital city, and Fappen Lake, the island's foremost natural landmark. Some crude, immature teenagers say that people go to Fappen Lake to fap, but that is just stupid. There is no relation between Fappen Lake and "fap."
Fappen Lake is said to be the greatest sight to see in all of Orgasm Island. Many a young couple have gone there over the years to enjoy the sights, and have "romantic periods" with each other. It is named after Friedrich von Fappen, Sir Cummington's German slave at the time. According to legend, when they saw the lake, it was so beautiful that Sir Cummington freed Fappen from slavery and proceeded to name the falls after his former slave. Or they just fapped...or something.